Locked Husband

The Compliant Man

2012-02-16T11:21:00.000-05:00

My last post touched on the topic of a husband in chastity jerking-off without the permission of his wife/keyholder. Not surprisingly, that can happen. This had me thinking this morning about the opposite situation. The locked male that does what he is supposed to do. He remains chaste when his keyholder tells him to, he locks up when he would rather not, and behaves himself even when he is not locked. He is, at the very least, sexually submissive to his wife/keyholder. “The compliant man” is how Lucy Fairbourne defines him in her book, Male Chastity: A Guide for Keyholders. I was unlocked yesterday and didn’t go back into the cage until this morning. I was horny, had plenty of excess desire brewing, yet I did not act on it. Not so much as a single stroke by my own hand. Believe me...I had plenty of opportunity. I showered alone after my wife had already left for work, and had more than enough time to rub out a nice orgasm or two. Yes, I wanted too. Yet, I didn’t. Instead, after I dried off, I dutifully grabbed the Steelheart and locked up J’s cock. I was aroused enough that I had a semi-erection and gently stuffed it into the smooth steel tube. Turned the key and put it away knowing full well I would not use it. I know it and she knows it. I think we have both come to the realization that while my day to day submission out of the bedroom waxes and wanes, my sexual submission does not. I am now completely content being sexually submissive to J. It’s her cock and I’m very happy to say that is just how it is now.

The chances of me having an unauthorized wank seems to decrease as time passes. J is getting close to finishing Lucy’s book, and I’m sure she’s figured out what type of husband she has. Compliant with a capital C.

I often see bloggers say “be careful what you wish for”. Perhaps it’s because we practice a pretty sane form of male chastity and low grade wife-led marriage that I don’t often ask myself, what the hell am I doing? I’m now living the fantasy I wanted and yeah, there are down days along with the up days. But that happens in vanilla marriage, too. There are days when I would like nothing more than to just relieve some stress with a nice self pleasuring orgasm. Maybe watch a few amateur vids and shoot a nice big load into a wad of tissues like I used to. But no. It’s no contest. I’d rather live like this then have that right.

Masturbation without Permission

2012-02-13T17:04:00.002-05:00

No, I did not masturbate! I haven’t masturbated without permission in at least a few months, maybe longer. It’s been long enough that I can’t tell you exactly when it last happened. I have had a couple of unintended ruined orgasms while playing with J, but that’s not the same thing as sneaking in a jerk-off session. My last unintended ruined orgasm actually happened yesterday. I was allowed inside J (it felt amazing), but was told I was not allowed to have an orgasm. I had just given her an orgasm with my tongue. I had moved up, entered her and was slowly pumping in and out. Then damn, I had to stop as I felt my orgasm approaching. I quickly pulled out, the cock glistening with her juices, and grabbed it like a vice grip in an effort to assure I did not cum. I thought I might have taken one too many strokes inside her luscious pussy. Even while still firmly squeezing my cock to stop from ejaculating any semen...I failed. After some delay, semen shot out. One stream shot hard, launching onto J’s face, and a second onto her chest, yet I felt very little of the orgasm. Damn! If I’m going to shoot a load like that, I want to feel it! I was actually pretty upset in the moment. J was a bit annoyed, but not really mad. It was obvious I had desperately tried to stop. Nonetheless, this is not the same thing as actually masturbating and cumming without J’s permission.

The reason I’m bringing up this topic is I was reading a recent post in another blog, A Spanking Marriage. The blogger, Susan, caught her husband Barry with his pants down, his chastity device (a cb-6000s with the lock still attached) resting on the desk, her cock in his hand, and a porn video running on the screen of his computer. As she indicated in the title of her post, he was “caught in the act”! Being that they are in an established FLR with Barry kept in chastity, she was livid. She requested some feedback from her readers on how to handle his blatant indiscretion. Since he is clearly able and willing to escape from his device, I suggested a Prince Albert piercing. As most of us that are locked know, these “trapped ball” devices are usually pretty easy to escape. They are nothing more than constant reminders and mental deterrents to unauthorized masturbation. The PA piercing would make it much harder, if not impossible, to escape without her knowledge. Some of the other suggestions included forced masturbation with things like hot sauce, making him consume his ejaculate over a salad, using ice on his cock as he nears orgasm, extreme spanking, etc. I’m curious what you think? How should a submissive chaste husband be punished for masturbating without permission?

When I break J’s rules, I am punished. It’s usually things like limits on my adult internet privileges, my blogging, or worst of all...denying access to her pussy. In my view, this is the harshest sentence she can give. I worship J’s pussy. It is the closest thing to heaven on earth for me. To be denied giving her pleasure is brutal. Thank God I tend to behave, so I’ve only been blocked total access for a day or two a while back for some unauthorized internet viewing. J tends to prefer to not tell me repercussions ahead of time, so I’m not sure what would happen if I pulled out and jerked off without permission. I’m pretty compliant these days, so doubt I will find out anytime soon. I’m happy to say that over time, my willpower to not masturbate has grown strong. I’m actually pretty proud of this, and am always happy to let J know “I was good” when I have had reason to be unlocked. I’ve become quite adept at only touching “her” cock as needed to pee, wash, etc. J doesn’t need to supervise me. That said, we both know that I still prefer the aid of my our device when we are not together. It’s just easier that way, and I do enjoy the constant reminder the steel provides.

New Poll

2012-02-08T17:54:00.000-05:00

As readers in the United States know, the US presidential election process has started. Lot’s of hot air all over the place! Don’t worry, I have no plans of airing my political rants here. Needless to say, this blog has nothing to do with politics. That said, I am curious about the political leanings of those reading. No matter if you’re in the USA or elsewhere in the world.

As for chastity, I’ve been locked most of the week with some teasing mixed in. My mood has been good, and I finally arrived in “chastity nirvana” earlier this week. Took some time, but I’m there. Also had great fun with J yesterday while still locked. Very intense session! No time now, but hope to post again soon.

Is Frustration a Good Thing?

2012-02-03T12:30:00.001-05:00

I’ve been locked all week. Well, almost all week. I was allowed to stay out one night, sans orgasm. I gave the Steelheart a good cleaning and showered the next morning. Shortly after that, back into the stainless steel tube. It’s been a tough week. Work has been insane, J has been cranky and not interested in any play. She’s been okay in terms of exerting her control, especially in keeping her property under lock and key. I do find it easier to get through a bad week if J maintains her control. I need to feel it when we don’t play and my stress level is high. It calms me. While we’ve had no playtime, J did give me a few nice strokes on my night “out”, but only enough to remind me of how nice that feels. It was wonderful, but very short lived. She has kept me locked since. She commented last night that I’m easier to “manage” when I’m locked. Hmmm...no wonder I’ve been locked so much!

I really feel like stroking "her" cock today...badly. I’ve been following all the rules, so I was given permission to do a little porn viewing this morning, and God...I so wanted to pull on my cock. I watched one video with a sexy woman riding a guys cock. They both reached orgasm at about the same time. I was very aroused, I wanted to be in that video at that moment. Or at least jerk-off as I watched her ride him to orgasm. When I showered today, I was soaped up and knew I could’ve easily pulled out. I didn’t. No, I thought, I’m exactly where I want and need to be. As much as I wanted to play with the meat, I was so happy I couldn’t. I’m so fortunate to have a beautiful loving wife that keeps me for her. I was glad I didn’t have that privilege.

My desire to cum is strong, but my desire to be under J’s control is stronger. Even a very frustrating day in chastity can be a positive thing. Chastity is wrong for some couples. For us, it is very right...frustration and all.

Who Knows?

2012-01-30T13:32:00.000-05:00

I started a new poll this past weekend. For the couples that play with male chastity, I’m curious...who knows about it? I would guess that the vast majority of couples keep it secret. I mean, who goes around telling their friends and family that the wife (or girlfriend) is in control of her man’s cock, whether by use of a chastity device or the honor system? If you’re curious, J and I have not shared the fact I’m often locked in a steel tube. I think it is one of those things that is best left as a hidden secret. Even so, I’m a little intrigued with the thought of J sharing the secret with one of her friends. No one in particular, there is just something hot about another female knowing about the control she has over my dick. It might be that it is so right for us that I want others to know. Maybe it’s the fact that I’m submissive and her telling a friend would reinforce that fact to someone in the outside world. She might say, “Yes, I keep his penis locked-up in a chastity cage. He’s not allowed to touch it without my permission. He isn’t allowed to jerk-off, and he can only cum when I allow it...and that doesn’t happen all that often...”. Imagine hearing that conversation at the table next to you!

I think I also like to imagine her telling other women about it so they can learn to lock-up their men. Even though there is truly no such thing as forcing a man to wear a device, I find myself thinking that all wives should lock-up their husbands. Crazy, I know. It’s just that I’ve become a big proponent of male chastity. It’s been a fantastic ride for us. I’m starting to believe that it’s the way it should be for every couple. Maybe someday ;)

So please vote in the poll!

A Day in the Life of my Wife Led Marriage

2012-01-26T11:07:00.004-05:00

Our WLM is tame in comparison to what I’ve read on many blogs. I realize that not everything I read is real. Even so, I believe there are many marriages where the wife leads with love, but also with strict authority. J and I are very much in a partnership. We talk about things, we make decisions together, and truly have a deep, intense love for each other. Outside of the sexual aspects, our WLM is not discussed very often. It has just become a part of our relationship and how we “do things”. Yesterday was a good example. Nothing extreme about it, but as I went to sleep last night it occurred to me that there were actually many things that were going on, without discussion, that showed her leadership and dominance in our relationship. I drove the kids to school, as I now always do, allowing J to sleep a bit later. Shortly after I arrived back home, I awoke J so she could get ready for work. We still often prepare our own breakfast, though I always clean-up the mess. I also make sure she has her vitamins. If it’s cold, I often warm-up her car. Our family schedules were chaotic yesterday, so we sort of “winged it” for dinner, but most nights it’s my job to get dinner together, clear the table, and load the dishwasher. J has a demanding job, and often brings home work, so it’s not like she is usually lounging when I clean. She is often on her laptop doing work. Not that it would matter much, I think I would still be doing those chores for her. Soon after dinner, I went grocery shopping and J settled down to relax for the evening. I came home, unloaded the groceries and put everything away, as she relaxed. It sort of struck me, that yes, she has accepted her new role as the dominant spouse. No leather, no whips, but she is in charge. She asked if I had everything under control (I did), and continued watching television as I took care of the groceries. A bit later she had me fetch a few things for her as she decompressed from her work day.

When it came time for bedtime, I asked her if she would like some “attention”. I’ve come to ask her if she “wants to play”, and if she does what she would like to do. Maybe not very spontaneous sounding, but it keeps J in full control of what we do in the bedroom, and she doesn’t seem to mind. J decided to keep me locked in the Steelheart. I wasn’t disappointed as some of our most intense lovemaking sessions have happened when I’m locked. We undressed as I began to feel her cock begin to stiffen inside the stainless steel. It felt so wonderful to be under her control. To know we would both be focused on her pleasure. It was an amazing play session. I was so full of passion for her. I kissed her all over. I love to worship her feet and toes, and was sure to give them some attention while I was on my knees. I felt so submissive to her, so worshipful. J looked so beautiful with her feminine power. I felt her sexual energy and influence washing over me. It was very powerful. I was allowed to pleasure her with my tongue. It was devine. She moaned a bit more than usual, at least I was experiencing it that way. As I flicked my tongue along her slit she writhed, clearly enjoying my worship. I used my fingers to increase her sensations, in both her pussy and gently around her ass. As I felt her approaching orgasm, I was starting to feel like I might have a release of semen in my tube. It seemed my prostate was pulsing, I was so incredibly aroused feeling her pleasure. J’s orgasm was intense and lasted a bit longer then usual. She was vocal as she came, moaning and telling me she was cumming. I felt that sense of fulfillment I often feel after J has an especially satisfying orgasm. We basked in her afterglow. One of my favorite things is kissing her after she has cum. Seeing that sated look on her face gives me such a peaceful feeling. While I was still highly charged, I felt mentally fulfilled. I suppose because I was...when J is in her afterglow, I am happy. It’s a mental state beyond what my own orgasm can provide. I’ll always want to cum, but my orgasm doesn’t provide the same reactions in my psyche that hers does. It was a fantastic day and evening. I asked J if I could shoot a few photos after, and she allowed it. I have a foot fetish (I do have my kinks!), so I took one of her foot against my caged cock.

I’m now at 5 days since my last orgasm. I’ve been locked all week, except for some cleanings and a business related trip into a secure building (metal detectors), so outside of maybe 6 hours, I’ve been in the Steelheart all week. And the new normal also seems to be sleeping locked 5-6 nights each week. I have also been denied any physical teasing this week, which is fine as long as we have intimacy like last night :) Of course, I am eager for her to touch the cock, but I am a patient husband as of late. The old saw, “be careful what you wish for”...I’m getting it, and not about to complain about it! It’s her cock, and I accept her schedule for stimulating it. It’s not like she keeps me waiting that long!

Lucky Hubby

2012-01-18T22:59:00.000-05:00

Not wanting to be overly repetitive, I’ve been struggling for blog topics. I’ll start writing something, look it over and just delete it. Anyway, today I want to touch on chastity. What it has done for me, my wife, and our relationship in general. At times, being locked can put me on a roller coaster, especially early in a chastity cycle. This can vary from one lock-up to the next. Our current cycle is only 4 days old, and I’ve been in a good mood. I’ve been on cruise control since I went back in the tube within hours of my last orgasm, which by the way, was inside J :) I’m learning that being locked sooner rather than later after an orgasm is the best way to reduce post-orgasm moodiness. It seems to keep me grounded and things just feel “right”. I don’t understand it completely, but I think part of it is I need to constantly feel J’s control, particularly her control of my sex. Being locked accomplishes that in spades. It’s something of a cliche in chastity blogs, but yeah, I am actually starting to prefer being locked. I’ve been locked almost 24/7 all week, and I’m not even a bit unhappy about it. I look in the mirror when I’m getting dressed and see the device and say, “yes, that is how it is supposed to be”. I’m just one of those men that should be locked...no wait, needs to be locked. I shouldn’t have free access to J’s cock, and amen...I often don’t. The new “normal”, I guess.

After a year plus playing with male chastity, I still think I like it better than J. I mean, she does like it, but I think I enjoy being controlled more than she enjoys controlling. That said, J gets a little bit better at being a keyholder everyday. She tends to be a little casual about keyholding, but serious enough to be effective. She has even been working her way through Lucy Fairbourne’s Male Chastity - A Guide for Keyholders. I’ll be very curious to see what changes I see, if any, after she finishes the book. She still isn’t very domme, but that’s okay. We’ve settled into our roles, and those positions work for us and our marriage. And while I still make it well known when I’m in the mood to play, she decides what we do and when. There are rules, but they are not hard to handle. Another cliche, but my wife truly is an amazing woman. She heard me out when I expressed my desire to try male chastity, and she gave it a shot. I have no regrets. I’m so glad we started this journey. Yes, I’m a very lucky man.

Permanent Denial?

2012-01-13T15:30:00.001-05:00

The topic of permanent denial has come up in a few blogs the past few weeks. So, I’m going to weigh in on the subject, too. To get to the point, permanent orgasm denial may appeal to some, but isn’t for me. No doubt, getting to the destination is part of the fun, but I do want to safely arrive there on each trip! Yes, I still want to have orgasms! Just because I enjoy male chastity doesn’t mean I never want to cum! I suppose what I really love is orgasm control as opposed to orgasm denial.

One of the things I enjoy about chastity is the unpredictability of when I will be allowed to orgasm. I love not knowing when I will climax. If I was in permanent chastity, well, there would be no end to the cycle. What fun is that?!? Just about everything in life would get boring if it never ended. Disney World is great, but do you really want to be there everyday and never leave? How about Chinese food? I like it...I really do, but I don’t want to eat Lo Mein everyday. I think a never ending chastity cycle is no exception. I guess the point is I look forward to ejaculating for J, and I’m happy to say she enjoys it, too. Enough on that.

Things have been pretty quiet in Locked Husband land. Not much sex even with the cock hanging free. Yeah, I’ve been unlocked the past few days. Just other family issues taking priority. Sick parent, flu bug being passed around our house...all kinds of fun. And J’s libido has been in a low period. Hopefully, that will change over the weekend. There was some talk about me maybe going back in to the Steelheart tonight. Guess I’ll know in a few hours.

2012 Came in with a Bang!

2012-01-05T23:29:00.001-05:00

Literally. New Year’s Day was fun. We had some amazing sex. J came hard on my mouth just the way we both like it. And then she wanted some good old fashioned sex. J wanted me on top and she wanted me to explode inside her. By the time I was approaching orgasm, I was not going to argue with her. I came hard for her. Very hard.

She said I could stay out of the tube all day, but I ended up asking to go back in that afternoon. I’m finding it is just easier to deal with any post-orgasm letdown by simply going back into the Steelheart. Locking-up the same day after an orgasm feels so much better than having unfettered access to “her”cock. After several days on the honor system around Christmas, I can say that the Steelheart is where the cock belongs when not in-use by J. I love the way I feel when I’m locked, and almost immediately feel under J’s spell after she takes the key. So why fight it? If it works for both of us, I might as well stay locked until she wants access to her cock.

I’ve been in the tube pretty much 24/7 since that afternoon, less some shower/clean-up time and two very good teasing sessions. I haven’t been allowed inside her since the 1st, but did get edged very nicely both times. Plenty of pre-cum. J is getting better at teasing, no doubt about it :)

Merry Christmas!

2011-12-25T14:24:00.000-05:00

Want to wish a Merry Christmas to everyone! Have a safe and happy holiday!

I've been in and out of the Steelheart quite a bit this week. J seems to want me in one minute and out the next. She's been sick (again!) and the teasing has been on and off. Bit of a chastity roller coaster the past few days. While I am unlocked right now, I'm still chaste on the honor system. I've become so accustomed to her control of the cock, that I'm not having much difficulty behaving, even on the honor system. I'm not expecting a Christmas orgasm, though J has dropped some hints I might be allowed early this week when the kids stay with Grandma...we can hope ;)

How Long?

2011-12-17T11:50:00.002-05:00

My last two polls have closed. The first poll asked how long a submissive husband should go between orgasms. The “right” answer? Not sure the poll shed much light on the answer to that elusive question. I’ll leave the closed poll up for a while.

The voting was all over the place. The only definite seems to be that virtually everyone thought a sub husband should wait one week or more between climaxes. Only 2% went with less than one week. While this is a very personal decision for each couple, I tend to agree it makes sense to go at least a full week...at least if you want to start aching for your woman. By 7 days into a cycle, I’m feeling pretty good and have that constant ache of desire for my wife. It’s something beyond what you feel only a day or two after an orgasm. To appreciate male chastity, you need some time for your longing to build. It takes time to get there, and in this case getting there is part of the fun, at least once you get past those drop-off, sometimes grumpy days. So you might as well stay a while!

The most popular choice was 3-4 weeks. I went with that timeframe. It’s not exceedingly long. Based on my recent 3 week cycle, it is long enough to keep me very energized for J and very attentive to her needs in and out of the bedroom. I felt very submissive to her, and loved it. Being openly submissive to J has been a fulfilling experience and something I want to continue to explore. As time goes on, I know we’ve made the right decision to pursue a wife-led marriage. As slow as things have progressed, J is maintaining pretty tight control on our sex life. Her new rules about my internet viewing are firmly in place, and I’ve become accustomed to no self-pleasuring outside of our playtime together. Of course, I’m not allowed to masturbate, but J’s rules also do not allow for any stroking. I’m not even allowed to ask to stroke, which I used to do often...maybe a text here, a little request there. No more. I’ve become very disciplined the past few cycles. Even when I’m allowed to hang free on the honor system, I’ve been very compliant.

Not surprisingly, the second poll was far more decisive. 75% said their favorite way to bring their woman to orgasm was orally. Yep, I’m with you there! I’ve always loved going down on J. It is so intimate. Her scent, her taste, her moans, her bucking as she reaches orgasm. A truly exhilarating and emotional act for me. I’m sure most horny males enjoy it, but for a submissive man that enjoys chastity? It often becomes a religious, worshipful experience.

I’m adding a new poll today. Topic is your involvement or interest in cuckolding. We don’t do it, and probably never will. That said, it is a very hot fantasy. Curious about the readers of my blog. Enjoy your weekend.

50k and climbing

2011-12-12T10:38:00.002-05:00

Not much time this morning, but decided to write a quick post.

My blog will be hitting 50,000 page views today. Not exactly a huge number, but still worth noting as a relatively novice blogger. I peruse several blogs and am often impressed at the writing skills out there. In comparison, my talents are probably average at best. Nonetheless, I’ve found blogging to be a great way to clear my head and am grateful that some find my journey interesting.

The hits have gone up quite a bit the past few months as I’ve posted more, and have been linked from other blogs. As I think is true for many chastity related blogs, I get the most clicks into my blog from the Keyheld blog listing. Second is Subservient Husband (to a loving wife). At All Times rounds out the top three. Those 3 blogs account for almost 30,000 hits (wow!). I also receive hits from Robert Anthony’s Chastity & Femdom, He Rules the Roost & She Rules the Rooster, Nemo’s Tease Denial & CBT, I’m Hers, and Grey Owl’s Haunt. Of course a few others, too, just far fewer hits. Thanks to each for adding me to their blog rolls.

I may post later this week about the ending of my last cycle. I was allowed to orgasm very early Sunday morning inside of J. My last full orgasm was 20 days earlier. I’m back in the Steelheart, but J seems pretty lax and hinted this morning she may want a keyholder break. Stay tuned.

16 and Counting

2011-12-07T16:38:00.000-05:00

However you count the days, I’m well past my longest chastity cycle. My last full orgasm was 16 days ago, and 12 days since that semi-ruined orgasm. My previous longest stretch without orgasm was 9 days. My wife has been going by the full orgasm date, and since she was there for the ruined one I guess that means she didn’t think it was much of a cum! If I go along with that, I’m a week past my previous record. It’s not about the number of days or record keeping, but I do think many men in chastity track the length of their cycles. I would find it difficult to not count. Maybe it’s because we men tend to be competitive and want to gauge our progress the way we do our favorite sports teams. Can you imagine no standings in professional sports? Speaking of that, must be tough being a Colts fan this year...0-12...ouch!

As I’ve touched on in earlier posts, this cycle has been different. It’s been long enough to have some undulations. While I continue to be locked in the Steelheart almost full-time, the last few days have been without much intimacy with J. She’s been under the weather the past couple of days, and her libido has gone out the window. It is always harder being locked without much intimacy. Even so, surprisingly, I’ve been feeling pretty good. It is probably due to the benefit of a longer cycle, and being further out from my last orgasm. Maybe being “deeper” into “chastity nirvana” helps me cope. I have been feeling submissive, too. I believe feelings of submission help me deal with less intimacy by having an increased desire to serve my wife. That’s my guess, anyway. I’ve actually asked J to verbalize her dominance a bit more, though that’s not her strong suit. I’m trying to keep the right mindset. One thing that has helped is being locked-up. Being under lock and key makes a huge difference for me. It keeps me in the right place, and keeps me patient and more submissive, even without much attention. If I was unlocked right now, I think I would be frustrated, and not in a delicious way! The Steelheart has been so comfortable, that it has been very easy to stay in the cage, even at night. Hopefully, J will be feeling better soon and the intimacy will return.

Submissive Orgasm

2011-12-05T11:11:00.000-05:00

There is no universal right or wrong on my first poll question. Since J and I have started down the road of wife-led marriage, I’ve been a bit pre-occupied with the topic of orgasm frequency for the submissive husband. There is a lot out there on the topic. Many men (and their wives) report an undesirable drop-off after male orgasm. I experience some crankiness, usually, a couple of days after orgasm. I also find I’m less attentive to my wife's needs. The less than stellar mood and inattentiveness seems to dissipate 4 or 5 days after my orgasm. I then usually start to feel the “chastity nirvana” around 5-6 days after orgasm. For me, I tend to think I get there a bit faster with frequent teasing. Interestingly, it’s been a longer trip to get to “nirvana” this cycle. I don’t think I started to really feel “it” until yesterday. I’m now in my longest cycle yet, 10 days past that somewhat ruined orgasm and 14 days since my last full orgasm. I also haven't been allowed inside J for about 12 days. My sense is the trip to nirvana took longer since I’ve been locked in the Steelheart a vast majority of the time the past 10 days, and have had very little actual teasing. Funny thing is, since J and I have had a lot of intimacy, I’m still in a very good place. As long as I can pleasure her, it seems all is well with the world! I still crave and want her touch on the cock, but am learning that I can go several days without stimulation as long as we still have that physical intimacy and mental closeness. I read a letter from a wife on Around Her Finger not long ago that said it pretty succinctly, and I suspect would work for me... "He is allowed to orgasm very seldom (about once a month), and I have found that as long as he is allowed to perform oral sex on me, he remains satisfied sexually and very content in his submissive role." I also find that serving J amplifies that closeness. Things like painting her toes dramatically increase those feelings. And even the more mundane tasks like making her coffee or serving her dinner also help.

The poll votes are clustered. So far with 42 votes, 30% went with 3-4 weeks as the ideal amount of time between orgasms. This was my vote, too. My thought is that while a longer period might actually be better, prostate health needs to be considered. From what I’ve read, I think a man should exercise the plumbing at least once a month. I’m no doctor, but that’s my opinion based on what I’ve read. A couple may decide to use prostate milking and ruined orgasms to extend the denial. J is not into milking, and thus far ruined orgasms aren’t part of her repertoire. The next most popular choice was 3+ months at 23%. I know hard core femdom couples often go with long term denial, so that may be where those votes are coming from, or perhaps from readers that want that type of relationship. I see the value of long term denial, and recently have even been craving it. I’ve been wanting a deeper submission to J, and believe that longer denial goes well with that concept. I can only imagine what a 3 month denial must be like, though reading blogs like Denying Thumper and Subservient Husband do give some insight. One thing I do believe is that extended lock-ups do lead to a more submissive mind set. Where that level plateaus, I’m not sure.

All that said, J and I had a conversation last night about the length of time between my orgasms. As of now, she is firmly against extending them much, if at all, beyond 2 weeks. It’s two-fold. She worries about the health aspects, and also just enjoys me cumming too much to wait that long between my climaxes. I think as a not so dominant woman, her desires are not exactly aligned with mine. So, that being the case, I see my role as letting her know what I’m thinking and feeling and then step back and allow her to lead. There, I have my answer! My ideal wait to orgasm is whatever J wants it to be. I sometimes forget how far J has come already. Going back many months, I had a hard time convincing her I didn’t need to cum everytime we played! J has since become my keyholder, the head of household, and my acknowledged Goddess. She knows where I stand, and we communicate well. While I may want to be denied longer, I need to accept what J wants.

Saturday Night

2011-12-01T16:39:00.002-05:00

This chastity cycle has been a bit different. Since I’ve been craving a longer cycle, I went ahead and asked J about a set release date to hopefully extend it a little further out. I do prefer not to know when I will be allowed an orgasm, but thought it might be fun to know I was going to have a longer run this time. To prevent either of us from worrying about my orgasm, so to speak. J almost always has me waiting a week or less, with the occasional 8 or 9 day cycle. I’ve been having increasing desires for longer cycles. It’s not a contest, but I’m not sure what the perfect length would be. I’d like to find out. My gut tells me it’ll be somewhere between 2 weeks and one month, but I could be wrong. I’m guessing at this point. What I do know is that I am craving the increased submissive feelings and the more intense “chastity nirvana” I experienced in those 8 or 9 day denials. I’ve read on a few blogs that a husband’s submission increases around the 2 week mark, and I want to see if I feel the same effects. J was open to it, and we agreed on 2 weeks. That was working fine until I had what I’d call an almost “ruined orgasm” 4 days in. Oops. We were having some very intense play, and I had just brought her to an intense orgasm with my ever eager tongue. I had moved up over her after she came to hold her, gently kiss her, and bask in her afterglow. As I did, I was ever so slowly grinding the hard cock against her stomach as I held her. With all the emotion and excitement coursing through me, I was rock hard and the little bit of stimulation I was generating against her stomach while kissing her was enough to bring on ejaculation. Once I realized what was happening, I stopped moving but it was too late. J’s cock had started pulsating and my cum spurted onto her stomach. I was more upset than J, but what was done was done. That happened a week ago, and no accidents since.

At this point, I think J is planning to allow me a full orgasm next Monday, time will tell. Since my oops orgasm, it has been a very good week of intimacy. I’ve actually lost count of how many orgasms I’ve given J, but I think the number might be 5 in the past week. That may not sound like a lot, but it is for J. Once she has an orgasm, she is usually fully sated for at least a few hours. Could she have another orgasm right away? Maybe, but her pussy becomes very sensitive after she climaxes, so much that she doesn’t want more stimulation. That means we’ve had lovemaking sessions almost everyday for the past week to bring her that many orgasms. I’m in a pretty blissful sexual state. I’m ready to get a tattoo, “Her pleasure is my pleasure”. If I didn’t believe, I do now! I’m feeling minimal frustration after 6 days without orgasm. I just don’t feel like I need or even want to cum right now. I don’t even want out of the Steelheart. I’m just in too good of a place to want to screw it up. I’ve been worshipping between J’s legs and there is really no place I’d rather be. As much as I love being inside of her...and I do, I think the most intense sexual thing we do is cunnilingus. I can think of very few things that are as emotionally fulfilling than bringing J to an earth-shattering orgasm with my mouth. It feeds so many hungers within. My desire to pleasure her, be submissive to her, and to worship her...to name a few. J does not orgasm from intercourse, so oral is the best way to make her feel orgasmic ecstasy. It makes it all that more special for me. The more I do it, the more I want it.

Saturday night was an especially exciting night. We had a nice evening out. Shortly after returning home I came out of the bathroom to find J mostly disrobed looking at herself in the mirror. God, she looked so sexy posing in just her panties. I was unlocked from our night out and immediately hardened as I moved towards my beautiful wife. I embraced her and started to passionately kiss her soft, pouting lips. Our tongues danced together as we slowly moved to the bed. I laid her back and removed her panties before removing my own clothes. Since we knew my next orgasm was over a week away, I knew it was going to be an exciting night focused on J’s pleasure. After some passionate kissing, I slowly started exploring her body. I gave attention to each and every part of her glorious form as I took my time moving down...gentle licks and kisses to her cheeks, neck, shoulders...then some love and attention for her beautiful chest and nipples. So perfectly perky. Then further, down her smooth stomach to the altar at which I worship. J is not shaved. She is trimmed, and I placed several soft kisses on her bush before soothing her lips with my adoring tongue. She was soon writhing in pleasure as I put all my focus on her pleasure. J was not yet crossing that magical threshold into her climax. This can happen when she is taking certain medications. No worry, it just means I need to spend more time worshipping her most intimate parts. As one would expect from a submissive husband, I am always extremely concerned with J’s orgasm. My own fulfillment is contingent on her pleasure. After many wonderful minutes between her legs, I offered to use the vibrator to help her achieve orgasm. While she is not a huge fan of vibrators, she allowed me to try it. She spread her legs a bit wider and placed one foot on my thigh as I laid perpendicular between her legs to work the vibe for her. J let out moans of delight as I continued moving the vibrator across her slit. The cock received some touching from J, but as far as I was concerned, it was all about her. She directed me a bit, then soon wanted to take over control of the vibe to help get her past the point of orgasm that was eluding her. She grabbed the vibrator and soon enough reached a wonderfully intense orgasm as I soaked in the pleasure on her face while gently touching her anus, and then she bucked and curled her painted toes as the pleasurable waves washed across her. It was such a perfect sight to see.

While she was not overtly dominant, it was the way we both focused on her the entire evening that was so erotic and pushed my submissive buttons. And of course, her implementing the new porn viewing rule and reminding me when I’m allowed to ask to stroke added to my submissive feelings. Since Saturday, I’ve brought her to a handful of orgasms, mostly while locked in the Steelheart. I love how J seems to grow increasingly comfortable having orgasms while I remain chaste.

Tastes of Dominance

2011-11-28T15:33:00.001-05:00

Things have been interesting in Locked Husband land. We did the typical Thanksgiving weekend festivities, but J and I also had some quality time in the bedroom. I also want to mention that I’m still loving the new Steelheart. Even so, J wanted me out most of the weekend (more on that later). The irritation issues I first experienced have not come back, so that’s a plus, too.

Based on the stats on my blog, many of you gravitate to the postings about our Wife Led Marriage, so I thought an update might be nice on that topic. While I still view it as pretty mild, I now do almost all the chores around the house, and J does very little. That is partly the WLM, but it is also due to my less demanding job. She works more hours than I do, and has more “homework” than I do. That being the case, I was doing more housework before we agreed on the WLM. In any case, I still pamper her more, make sure she has whatever she needs, and as you might expect, put her first in the bedroom. She enjoys the pampering, no surprise there. And I enjoy making her feel like a Goddess. In the bedroom, she still has a hard time allowing me to put her needs first and foremost. This isn’t always a problem, but it is something she struggles with as a loving wife.

Lately, I’ve been getting more flashes of dominance from J. She’s quicker to have me get her a drink from the kitchen, or run an errand. Not huge things, but tasks that she no longer needs to do, since I can do them for her. I think I’m feeding her dominance, which is a positive from my perspective. This weekend, in addition to the tasks she’s been more likely to assign, she also established a new rule, and reiterated another that we had talked about in the past. We had talked about me not being allowed to ask to stroke the cock when I’m unlocked. By our rules I’m not supposed to touch, stroke, or otherwise masturbate “her” cock during a chastity cycle, even if I’m unlocked. The only touching should be to wash and use the bathroom. So the topic of rules came up and she reminded me of that rule. I am allowed to ask during our lovemaking, assuming I’m out of the device. Then she told me another rule...a new one I was not expecting. When J isn’t home (or when we’re apart), I am no longer allowed to view porn, nude photos, or videos. I can still read forums and blogs (Thank God!). I was taken aback, so I asked her why? J told me she thought it would help keep me more focused on her. She knows me well, and I’ve never hidden the fact that I enjoy perusing sites like Tumblr, Flickr, etc. Hell, I used to very routinely masturbate to orgasm while viewing those sites with her full knowledge. Even though masturbation is now rare, I still looked. I just didn’t stroke! So, boom, that is no longer allowed, unless she is home. When J is home, the only time I usually view those type of sites is after the kids are in bed when we’re sitting on the couch watching what she wants on TV (she controls the remote). An unexpected rule, but one I will do my best to follow. I’ve read that that’s what real dominance is, the submissive not topping, but allowing the domme to truly make the rules that she wants. I am the submissive husband, so I intend to do just that. I’m starting to get what I asked for, her taking control of me. We had a very intense lovemaking session in the bedroom on Saturday night, which I will cover in my next post. I will say I did not have an orgasm and that I’ve been locked in my Steelheart since, minus a quick cleaning.

Stainless Steel!

2011-11-23T14:38:00.002-05:00

The new device has arrived! J’s cock is now safely encased in German engineered steel. Our new chastity device is the Steelworxx Steelheart. This is no toy ladies and gentlemen. This is a very solidly crafted cage designed for the discerning male chastity enthusiast. I am loving it already. The comfort, the total lack of physical and visual access, and the hot look of the polished steel. And it even emanates body heat! It feels more a part of you than a plastic cage! That makes for a better experience.

I ordered it with two standard base rings. The rings are nice and smooth, and easy to put on. The tube is highly polished and looks very sexy. J was immediately impressed with the Steelheart. She finds it much easier on the eyes, and agrees with the adjective “sexy”. She found the plastic tube to be anything but sexy! The steel tube is even thicker and more solid than I expected. Seriously, I wouldn’t be surprised if it was bullet proof! Workmanship is also at a very high level. The device feels smooth throughout, including weld points. I did do a bit of extra polishing at the point of some irritation (at the head) on the first day, but that seems to have resolved. Outside of that irritation, the Steelheart has been very comfortable. My CB-6000s is very comfortable, but the Steelheart is more comfortable thus far. It’s too early to do a review, but my initial impressions are very positive.

I absolutely love the integrated lock. It is compact, and doesn’t move around since it is a permanent part of the ring and tube. I also like the key operated lock. One thing that moved me towards the Steelworxx devices and away from Mature Metal cages was the integrated lock. I can still keep an emergency key secured in tape inside my wallet. Hard to do that with a screwdriver. I like the symbolism of a padlock, but I didn’t want the clanking or the extra bulk of a padlock.

I’m sure I’ll be talking more about the Steelheart in upcoming posts. The included photos are yours truly sporting the new steel.

CB-6000s Review - Part Two

2011-11-17T10:31:00.001-05:00

I have found wearing the CB-6000s to be a comfortable experience. As I’ve mentioned, I am not locked 24/7. Even so, I have worn the device for as long as 4 days without release. That was the longest stretch, but I have also been caged several times for 2-3 full days duration. This is most often when J is traveling during a chastity cycle. These longer lock-ups have not been a problem. The device is so comfortable for me, that it is not uncommon for me to forget I’m wearing it. Of course, if I’m not busy or am around J, I become fully aware of “her” cock being held captive. :)

In my opinion, daily wear of the CB-6000s has only two real challenges. The first is keeping the device and cock squeaky clean. I purchased the cleaning swabs and spray bottles offered by keptforher.com and have found them effective in staying clean. I use a soapy swab to clean inside the tube, and use the small spray bottle (white cap) to thoroughly rinse inside the device. I spray water into the vents on the side of the tube and block off the end of the device with my finger to allow the cage to flood with clean water to rinse out the soap. I usually do this a few times to get as clean as possible. The biggest pain in daily wear is going to the bathroom. I’m fully aware that many men use urinals with these devices. When it comes to using a urinal while wearing a device, I firmly believe you WILL pee on yourself at some point. There are those that have and those that WILL! I am not comfortable with that risk, so I sit. It’s a pain, and is one thing I really dislike about wearing a device. While I am a submissive husband (most of the time!), I don’t get excited by needing to sit to pee. I wish it turned me on.

The other concern I have with my CB-6000s is the fact that it will probably spilt at the seam at some point. The CB tubes are known to split at the seam, and I hear it’s not a very pleasant experience...ouch! I do inspect the tube before I lock-up, and mine looks good so far. Just something to be aware of, and a good reason to carry an emergency key. I have always kept a key in my wallet. The key is secured in tape with a piece of paper noting the date it was sealed. J has not bothered with signing it, etc., as she’s just not that rigid. I may be locked, but it is still a form of the “honor system”.

I’ll conclude by recommending the CB-6000s to anyone seeking a reasonably priced chastity device. It was a perfect choice for us being new to male chastity and having absolutely no idea about sizing, or if I would even like the reality of being locked-up. I can’t imagine trying to order a custom device without the information I gathered wearing the CB for the past year. Now I know I really do enjoy chastity, and we know J has come to enjoy locking me up, too. And with everything we’ve learned, we have decided to graduate to a metal device. J likes how I am when locked, but has never liked the visual aspect of the CB-6000s. She does like the look of metal, and we are eagerly awaiting the arrival of the new cage.

A Quick Break

2011-11-07T14:54:00.005-05:00

There will still be a Part 2 for my review, just not today. Instead, I’m writing about our little chastity break.

I just went back into the CB-6000s after a few days off. It ended up being a full chastity break. That means that I was allowed to play with the cock without asking for permission. The cock was once again, my cock to do with as I pleased. Within reason, of course...we are a happily married monogamous couple after all! We’ve taken a few of these breaks since we started with male chastity last year. A few of the breaks were pretty long, up to maybe 3+ weeks. Not this time. While we were due for a little hiatus, I think we both sort of gravitated back to locking me up more naturally this time. It’s slowly becoming the normal condition for us...meaning the cock being under J’s control, even when it’s hanging free.

At first it was a little weird. I played with the cock the first day I was free, and it didn’t get all that hard. J was not there, and with her not with me, it felt strange...like “her” cock knew something was amiss. At that point I actually thought about just locking myself back up, but decided to go ahead and get some exercise. I did end up masturbating to orgasm, though it wasn’t very good. More perfunctory than anything else. Once I had that first orgasm, it was easier to masturbate the next time and the cock was much harder. The next orgasm was also better. Guess it just needed a warm-up. So, I pulled on it a handful of times and it was nice. I do think a chastity break can be healthy. Sort of like taking a vacation. It gets the so called plumbing working, and gets the juices flowing. Within a few days and a few orgasms later, I was starting to once again crave that control I’ve come to love. I think J needed a breather, too. It does take some work to be a keyholder, at least to be a good one. J has grown into it, but it is something else to do above the demands of work, kids, and home. Even though she needed the break, I think she noticed a difference in my attention to her and was ready to go back. I like how we both seemed to be ready at the same time without any real discussion. I brought it up and she was all over it. I’m back where I think I need to be, as J’s locked husband.

CB-6000s Review - Part One

2011-11-04T10:28:00.001-04:00

It’s now close to a year since we bought our first chastity device, the CB-6000s. Even though there are several reviews out there in the blogosphere, I thought I would post my own. I’ll also include J’s feedback since I started wearing the cage. I bought it at Keptforher.com when it was on sale for around $125. It currently sells for $149.95. We are upgrading to metal very soon, but I think the plastic CB models are an excellent place to start for someone new to male chastity. The cost of a custom device is often more than double the price of a plastic CB device, and with add-ons like an extra base ring can easily hit $400+. Initially, J wasn’t thrilled with the thought of spending even $125 on a device. Male chastity was my idea, and we started on the honor system. The honor system is great, but I was not always able to behave without a device to discourage playing with the cock. I thought a device would make masturbation difficult enough to help keep my hands off J’s property! Turns out I was correct. Even though I have no PA piercing to assure security, I have never tried to escape. The constant reminder of why I wear the device works like a charm.

J’s initial reaction to the device when she first saw it attached to the cock was something along the lines of “wow, that is really bizarre looking”. She found it pretty unattractive and thought it looked very uncomfortable. She was surprised I could even tolerate wearing it. At first she was adamant that I take it off every night before bed, and to this day still has me take it off most nights. I might wear it 2-3 nights in a week if we’re in an active chastity cycle. That’s up to her.

For those of you fully versed on the CB devices, I apologize for the boring specs. The CB-6000s comes with 5 base rings (also known as the “A” ring or “Cuff” ring). The rings inside diameters are 2”, 1 7/8”, 1 ¾”, 1 5/8”, and 1 ½”. The tube is 2 ½” long. The device also includes 2 “base pieces” that are used to complete the ring and include guide pins to attach the cage to the base ring. The device also comes with 4 different length locking pins and corresponding spacers. The different spacers allow you to increase or decrease the size of the gap and the overall length of the device. It required some experimenting to find what combination of ring and spacer/locking pin worked for me. I started with the second largest ring (1 7/8”) and second to largest spacer. It was comfortable, but I soon determined the gap seemed a bit too large. I had too many instances of a ball escaping through the ring. I soon went down to the second to smallest spacer. I wore that combination for several months. I found it very comfortable during the day, and tolerable at night as long as I remembered to lube at the bottom of the ring before bed. If I forget to lube, the burning sensation on my scrotum can be very painful. I use a high quality hand cream (i.e. Aveeno). That has worked well, so I’ve never tried the silicone lubes.

I recently went down to the 1 ¾” base ring. I’ve read that your body adjusts to wearing a device, and it is common to go down in ring size over time. I’ve found this to be true. I was still comfortable in the larger ring, but still had an occasional ball escape, so decided to try one size down. I also tried the smallest spacer. This worked out fairly well, though I found my flaccid length was a little too long for the smallest spacer, and went back to the second smallest spacer. This gives me a smidge more room, and is more comfortable. With the smaller base ring, I’ve also been able to alleviate the escaping ball problem, too.

More to come…

Survey Says...

2011-10-24T12:15:00.001-04:00

My poll has closed. I’m not too surprised the way the votes went. For my my wife, I went with “a little dominant”. That was what most of you said, with nearly half going with that choice. It appears that most wives aren’t overly dominant, and I’m betting that many of us wish they were more of a domme, at least in our fantasies!

My last post covered my thoughts on cuckolding. Another thing that can get me going is a very dominant woman. There is just something so intensely sexy about a confident, strong woman getting what she wants when she wants it. It’s not about a costume, either. It’s how she carries herself. How she uses her feminine power to influence her man. How she can have him eating out of the palm of her hand. Very hot. I get very turned on reading about some of the more dominant wives out there in the blogosphere. One such wife is “Q”. She blogs with her husband “k” here . Q is a very dominant wife and clearly her husband is thriving under her dominance. She has such a powerful and erotic control over k. It sounds like the dynamic works exceptionally well for them, and is a great read. Every couple is different, but they clearly have a very exciting wife led marriage. Perhaps beyond what many couples would ever experience. That’s not to say that I’m unhappy with J’s dominance over me. Actually, it’s been amazing. J has been herself, and has gently been taking control in her own way. J has been somewhat unpredictable, and I love it. I love the suspense. I’m at a point where I really don’t know what she’ll want from day to day. It’s exciting. She’s been deciding when I will cum, even if it’s before I’m ready. She again wanted me to cum this weekend prior to breaking my 9 day record. Know what? I think it’s great. She was ready for her cock to orgasm, so I did. It made her happy. She lovingly stroked her cock, and gently massaged my balls to her and my delight. God, it felt good. J told me I would be cumming, even though she knew full well I wanted to wait longer. Her touch is so soft, yet so intense. I had very little teasing the entire week, so the cock was incredibly sensitive to her touch. I confirmed permission to release, then I erupted shooting a few long streams towards her face and neck. J let out a wonderful moan as I came for her. She was very happy that I climaxed for her, and her excitement made it all the more earth-shattering for me. It was a unique session, as she denied me access to her pussy. I wanted to pleasure her so badly, but she only wanted to play with her cock.

J has also decided to deny me penetration the past few weeks, and I’m fine with it, because that’s what she wants. If nothing else, I’ve been dreaming about being inside her pussy again. It’s been about 2 weeks since I’ve slid into her, a very long time for us. This is life with her in control, and her now fully implementing that power to suit her sexual wants and needs. This is a beautiful thing. I am embracing it. I love the mantra “her pleasure is my pleasure”. I feel a warmth inside as I learn to want what she wants.

Swinging? Cuckolding? Oh my!

2011-10-20T16:27:00.005-04:00

I never did start a new poll on the fantasies/kinks outside of male chastity and femdom. Not sure I will. At least a few of the blogs I follow have mentioned some of the more extreme fantasies of permanent chastity, cuckolding, etc . I do think the average chaste male has more than just one kink that arouses us in our plastic or metal tubes. My wife is fully aware of mine. One of my biggest fantasies is cuckolding or hotwifing. Most of you are probably aware of those two terms. If not, “google” them. If you want to see it happening, try a video website like yuvutu.com or Xtube. We’ve never been swingers, nor have I ever been cuckolded by my wife. That said, it is something I have often thought about. I still enjoy watching the occasional cuckold video, even though I’m often locked and masturbation has become a very rare event for me. I don’t always visualize the men taking my own wife, sometimes just enjoying the other man’s wife being taken by her lover. I especially like when the husband is present and filming the video, and even better if he gets involved. I find the whole concept of a husband wanting his bride to be taken by another man, often better endowed, to be highly erotic. Often, these cuckold husbands then clean-up their wife’s pussy right after the lover has ejaculated inside of her. I mean, how taboo is that?!?! It is just off the scales! It’s all together, for me, a very hot scene to imagine. No question, cuckolding is the hottest kink in my mind. Is it disconnected from reality? Hell yes! First, my wife has known about this fantasy for several years. We actually talked about plain old “swinging” several years ago, and both decided against it. J was far more interested in experiencing a woman, than another man. J was also not comfortable with me fucking another woman. I believe I was more comfortable with us swapping with another couple, but also felt a certain uneasiness with the whole idea. So, we shelved it. The topic comes up every so often, and we both still feel we made the right decision to not pursue it. If we ever did anything, I would guess it would be bringing a woman into the bedroom, more for J’s benefit. Again, who knows if that will ever happen. Not something I’m too worried about. We’re having fun with male chastity and our own brand of WLM. You might call it WLM “lite”.

As for my current cycle? It’s going well. I’m on Day 6 and while tease & denial has been a bit sparse, I’m back in the zone, so not feeling overly needy. While every cycle is a little different, once I get to about Day 5, I start experiencing Chastity Nirvana type symptoms and things get better. I’m once again hoping J will allow this cycle to continue at least another several days, though I try not to “top from the bottom”.

Caged and in Control

2011-10-13T10:31:00.000-04:00

My “not so dominant” wife has been slowly progressing in her dominance. Without much fanfare she has taken full control of our sex life. I’ve often thanked her for taking control, with J giving me a nice positive purr in response. I am embracing my submissive feelings and loving my lack of control. There have been a few times where I really thought something was going to happen, and then she changed her mind. This can be exciting and frustrating at times, but I'm thrilled that she is starting to truly feel in control. She allows sex when she wants it. J is no longer asking “will you be okay waiting?” I don’t know when I will be allowed to pleasure her, and have no clue when she will allow “her” cock to spurt. And unsure of when she will allow me inside of her. That’s how I want it, and I am now getting it. I’m becoming used to only 1 and sometimes 2 orgasms in any given week. I’ve had 3 orgasms so far this month, of which only 2 were allowed. I don’t track mine or hers, but I think J has had 5 orgasms. I’ve been locked almost full-time the past several days and haven’t been out of the cage at all for the past 48 hours. The cock has never been locked as much as in the past month. J is clearly becoming more comfortable keeping her cock in the cage. I’m not sure if I’ve ever been happier in our marriage.

As for the wife led marriage, we are also making progress there. All I’m really doing is as much for her as I can. J loves it and has been happy to have me run around for her, at home and otherwise. She wanted a cold glass of water in the middle of the night a few nights ago when I was unlocked. I went into the kitchen to get it for her as her cock bobbed up and down, nearly fully erect as I served her. Our cocks don’t lie, they do let us know what we like! I often harden in the device as I take care of J. For those of you that worry about turning into some sort of jellyfish if you submit to your wife…it hasn’t happened. I haven’t turned into a wimp, I just try to anticipate her needs. That’s been the key. J doesn’t need the extra work of figuring out what to do with her submissive husband. Her submissive husband (me) anticipates what I can do for her. Of course, she knows I’ll take care of whatever she asks, too. We don’t talk about the whole WLM thing much, but she knows she’s in charge and can make a decision when she wants.

The FLR poll closed a few days ago, and nearly 80% of voters were in a female led relationship...wow! Did I already say that?!?! The numbers didn’t vary much throughout the poll. That said, I’m curious about the wives/girlfriends in those relationships. How “domme" are the women? I’m putting a new poll up to see what readers have to say. I’m also thinking about adding another poll about your favorite kinks/fantasies. Well, I'm pretty sure my readers kink on chastity and maybe femdom. So I'd give you a few other choices!

Rough Morning

2011-10-11T10:39:00.000-04:00

Not the easiest of mornings for us. It followed an evening with some heated discussion about finances, often a contentious topic. The details of that aren't important, but it ruined the chance for the intimacy I was craving. I was unlocked, and eager for some play sans orgasm for me, and plenty of oral pleasure for J. We were okay by the time we went to bed, but both mentally drained. We did cuddle a bit, then drifted off to sleep.

I woke exceptionally horny. J was preoccupied with work on her mind. I locked back up first thing, and while I was enjoying the frustration to a point, I was feeling needy...very needy. I struggle with this sometimes. I'll feel an overwhelming need to be close to J, and to serve her. When I feel like that, it can be very hard if it's not happening. I need that verbal acknowledgement you hear about. I want to know that she is still in control. I need J to tell me that she understands my frustration, but that she needs me to wait for her. She wants me to stay locked and restrain my urges for her. She knows I'm aching for her, but that it is something I must feel for her. I need to prove to myself that I have accepted her loving dominance. For me, behaving during the more stressful moments makes me feel it is truly real. When I'm upset, and remain chaste, I accomplish something for her, and for us. It signals real progress in our journey. It means something when I'm not getting the attention and her control seems absent, yet I stay the course. The sexual frustration may go from enjoyable to taxing. I'll start to think about turning on the computer and playing with "her" cock to relieve the stress. Will that ever happen? Probably, but not today. I am going to accept it, and be the devoted locked husband I strive to be.

Locked and Happy

2011-10-05T16:16:00.000-04:00

I’m happy to say that my wife has fully acknowledged my unauthorized release yesterday (see my last post). She wasn’t terribly upset. Probably more surprised and a little disappointed. In any event, I locked up last night, and J kept me caged overnight. I am still locked, and she hinted I won’t be coming out tonight. I don’t misbehave on purpose, but am glad she is keeping me under lock and key.

Early this morning, I held J close as we awoke. I felt both physically and emotionally very close to her. I felt way beyond a day since my last orgasm. My sense is that yesterday’s release was not fully ruined, but enough to keep me wanting. I really wanted J as I spooned her. After some pillow talk, J told me that I could go down on her. Oh, what sweet music to my ears! There was no discussion about unlocking the cock. I knew I didn’t deserve it, and so did J. I felt the cock begin hardening inside its plastic prison. A condition that I am finding feels more and more “right” as time goes by. I love making her cum while I’m locked. It makes me feel submissive, and it also allows her to really focus on her own pleasure. J is an exceptionally caring woman, and being concerned for me, will often grasp and stroke “her” cock while I orally pleasure her. When I’m locked, she doesn’t need to worry about anything. It allows both of us to work on that one mission…making her cum as intensely as possible. I suspect this is a top desire of any submissive husband. As I enjoyed her pussy, she barely touched “her” caged cock and balls. It was about her, and I think she knew it. J gets very wet when she is aroused. She was soaked. I worshipped her pussy with total abandon. I was feeding off her moans of delight. I became more frenzied with desire as she writhed in pleasure. It was a religious experience for me. I don’t know if you call it “sub-space” or what, but when J is especially aroused there are few other things that bring me more pleasure and excitement than making her feel that way. J eagerly took the pleasure being provided by my tongue and fingers. She finished with a wonderful climax, pressing hard against my mouth. I was in heaven as she grinded against my face. After her orgasm subsided, I went up to hold her, stroke her beautiful face, and gently kiss her lips while she enjoyed the afterglow of her orgasm. She looked so beautiful and sated. I was aroused, yet felt such fulfillment as I held her close. She seemed to sense this looking at me as I held her. It was a very emotional and intimate moment. Sometimes I’m amazed at how intense our lovemaking can be without so much as even a mention of the cock. I hope she will always want to hold that key. It opens much more than just my device.

Damn it!

2011-10-04T18:08:00.001-04:00

Damn it...like the title says. I fucked up again today, but not in the same way as last time. After being locked much of the past several days, J let me sleep unlocked last night and let me stay out today since we were together a good chunk of the day. So, since I'm hanging free, I decided to ask if I could stroke the cock a bit. With absolutely no intention to cum, of course. She said yes, without any reservations from what I could tell. I'm on Day 6 since my last orgasm, so I'm feeling pretty good, and not really looking to cum. Mostly, I was looking forward to going down on J tonight, maybe with a little teasing.

So, I'm stroking a bit and before I even know it, cum starts pouring out, not forceful, more like a ruined orgasm. I was startled with how fast this happened, and actually stopped stroking for a few moments. While pleasurable, I'd say it was 90% ruined. Needless to say, I'm not happy about it. I let me wife know, and based on her text, she's not too upset. Wish she would've told me "no". I would have complied, even unlocked. I've been very good this cycle, with zero cheating. Never should've asked. Damn.

To Lock, or Not to Lock

2011-09-29T21:10:00.000-04:00

Our last cycle was truly amazing. Surprisingly, we didn’t end up breaking our record. J allowed me to climax during sex at the tail end of day 9. I thought about asking her to make me wait, but decided to just do what she wanted, as I was inside of her. I didn’t want to disrupt the passionate session we were having by trying to get her to change her mind about my orgasm. Honestly, I was hoping for at least a couple more days. I was feeling good, and my desire for J was very strong. I didn’t want to lose the emotions and feelings I was experiencing. But, as long as we’re communicating, I want to accept her desires, and that includes cumming when she wants me to cum.

Now since that cycle ended, things have been pretty flat. She didn’t ask me to lock-up. I was hanging free for a few days straight. When I’m with J, that seems to work okay. I behave, and don’t play with the meat. Then I was home alone. J still hadn’t asked me to lock the cock. Sometimes this is not a problem, and other times it can be a real temptation for me. Yesterday, I was bad…very bad. J was gone all day. She had early meetings at work, so was gone earlier than usual. I had the day off. Not a good combination when her cock is hanging free. She never told me to lock, and I never asked. I thought about asking, but wanted to see what she would do. Yes, I was testing my wife in our early WLM. Maybe we both failed that test. Once I started checking out the blogs as I do everyday, the trouble started. Before you know it I’m perusing Tumblr. And the slippery slope became quite slick. Not long after her cock was hard, I decided to let him out for some air. Of course, in my weakened state, the hand gravitated and I probably don’t need to tell you where that story ended. Certainly not her fault, but as I reflect, I think I somehow justified it since J didn’t tell me to lock-up before leaving. Is this right? No, and I know that.

I owned up to my masturbation this morning. In typical fashion, my not very dominant wife gently scolded me, but it appears to be no big deal. She did have me lock the cock today. Funny thing is that is all it takes. I have never attempted to escape the cage, nor used the key without J’s permission. I need that constant reminder. It makes her control real for me. It is impossible to forget when I’m locked.

Desires Exposed

2011-09-22T14:51:00.000-04:00

My latest poll has not had the results I thought it might. With 51 votes, a whopping 49% of voters said they were in a Female Led Relationship. And another 29% said their wife/girlfriend was in charge, just not officially acknowledged. Wow, that’s 78% of the voters stating the woman is the boss. I know that male chastity dovetails very nicely with the FLR/WLM lifestyle, but I didn’t think that nearly 8 in 10 viewers of my blog were in that type of relationship. Guess I expected many living in an FLR, just not that many.

Does male chastity make a husband more likely to want, and pursue a FLR? For me, I think it accelerated that desire. I can remember viewing websites focused on the topic several years ago and becoming excited and highly aroused at the concept of submitting to my wife. Yes, even masturbating to those thoughts. I thought about it, but never really thought it was something I’d want to do for real. Once J and I started playing with orgasm control last year, my thoughts wandered back to having a Wife Led Marriage. I went back to the websites, and read up on the lifestyle. It scared me a bit, but was also very appealing. I couldn’t deny my desire to approach J. After doing my research, I brought up the topic one night. As I mentioned in an earlier post, that first attempt failed. This time, I think we will succeed. J has been in charge in a subtle way. And she knows that she can make any final decision. I’ve also been pampering her. She absolutely loves that aspect of our WLM. She is more into that piece, than the decision making authority she now possesses. J has also become a pretty good keyholder, too. She is less worried about making me wait. I’m finding her ever so slowly more willing to accept pleasure while I remain wanting. And of course, during the times when I am locked and denied, my desire to submit increases.

I believe that chastity has brought us to where we are today. Without it, I doubt I would have fully realized and went after my desire to have J in charge. Male chastity has allowed me to peel away the layers to get down to my innermost desires, and that is something that brings us closer. Exposing my hidden wants and desires has been very liberating. I am fortunate to have a wife willing to entertain my needs. I love her with all my heart.

Weekend Update

2011-09-19T13:18:00.000-04:00

I’m now at 6 days since my last orgasm. Since we’ve agreed to re-try the WLM, my wife, J, has been a bit more active in her control. In addition to her control of my sex, she has also been keeping me busy around the house. I’ve also been enjoying pampering her as much as possible, and I love it. I highly doubt J will allow an orgasm before 10 days. She has mentioned twice that she might have me break my record, which stands at 9 days. She had me out of the cage most of the weekend, and I went back into lock-up this morning.

We had some great intimacy over the weekend. One session was especially exciting. I was really unsure what she was going to do, and had no idea if I would be having an orgasm. I’m one of those guys that really prefers not to know ahead of time if I’ll be allowed to cum. And as twisted as it might seem, I also enjoy those times when she denies me from penetration. This was one of those times. We kissed very passionately, and we were both highly aroused. I slowly kissed from her lips, all the way down to her pussy. Very slowly, making sure to enjoy every inch of her amazing body. I was so hard, and she was very wet by the time I reached her engorged pussy. After several minutes of worshipping with my tongue, J let out some wonderful moans and I felt her buck against my adoring mouth as she climaxed. I was overwhelmed with her gentle scent and the emotion that I feel when I please her this way. After her orgasm, I moved back up over her, for some intense kissing as my cock was teased by her skilled hands. I was feeling very good. At this point I still had no idea if she wanted me inside or if I’d be allowed to release. I was allowed neither. With a bit of discussion, she decided I should wait, and said I might be waiting long enough to break my 9 day record. I was impressed, and told her so. She seemed happy that I was embracing her control. She seems to go in and out of these moments, and I want her to know I’m thrilled when she exerts that control. Feeding her dominance, so to speak. Too early to tell, but I do like the odds of the WLM working this time.

I absolutely love being inside my sexy wife. I love how her pussy feels when I’m moving inside of her. I love the intimacy of penetrative sex. I love to hold her as we make love. I guess it’s just my submissive side that also enjoys those times when I’m not allowed to penetrate J. I want it to be more about her wants and needs, and when that means no fucking, so be it. She hasn’t allowed me inside of her for something like 10 days. I know it will be heavenly when I’m finally allowed to slide into her. I actually have a much more difficult time if I’m denied from orally pleasuring her. J was a little upset with me last night about something from earlier in the day, and told me I was being punished. This is a first for her. I was pretty impressed. She let me remain out of the cage, but decided to not allow me to pleasure her. And all I received was a handful of slow strokes with her soft hands on my cock. Enough to get me hard as a rock and to simultaneously make me ache even more for her. Even so, all I really wanted to do at that point was worship her pussy. I wanted to feel her cum. I didn’t care about cumming, what I needed was to absorb her orgasm with my mouth, and hold her close while she relaxed in the afterglow of the pleasure I had given her. She denied me that experience last night. I accepted it, and told her it was her right. I have accepted her authority. She said she might let me go down on her in the morning. So I went to sleep with that thought in my mind.

I awoke this morning with a hard cock and was excited at the potential for going down on J. She woke sometime after I did, and told me she didn’t have enough time. I admit to pouting some, but quickly apologized to her. Even with the pout, I still felt obedient, which helped. I showered, locked up the cock and went about my business. Surprisingly, I wasn’t feeling especially charged after I locked up, considering I’m 6 days into this cycle. I want to cum, but the need doesn’t feel urgent yet. Even with the active weekend we had, the thing I’m still craving is more intimacy with her. I want to hold her, kiss her, worship every inch of her body, and make her moan. God, I want to make her moan! It consumes me sometimes. It’s like I could go without orgasm for weeks, as long as I can make her feel good.

I decided to post a pic of me locked with J holding “her” cock. Every so often, I might add a personal photo. This is our first.

Wife Led Marriage?

2011-09-16T12:42:00.001-04:00

As I mentioned in my previous posting I’ve been thinking about the whole FLR/WLM (Female Led Relationship/Wife Led Marriage) concept again. I actually approached my wife on this topic last year. I had often thought about my submissive tendencies over the years, and finally built up the courage to approach her. Without going into great detail, let’s just say that I think I probably did 90% of the talking that evening. As I inferred in that last post, I think I did a very good job of telling my wife how to be the dominant partner in our marriage! Of course, it failed. And the reason it failed in short order was due to my pre-conceived ideas of what my wife needed to do. Now, to be clear, I’m not talking about fantasy land domme type things like ropes, chains, strap-ons, and leather. Believe it or not, that stuff never did much for me. What I did do, was tell her in great detail what I thought a dominant wife should say and do. So when I reflect back on our attempt at a wife led marriage last year, I see that I was essentially “topping from the bottom”. Sure, I did the chores, pampered her, and catered to her sexually. Problem was my frequently giving her “advice” on what to do and when to do it. So after maybe 2 weeks, we pretty much shelved it. We continued to play with male chastity, but outside of some household chores I continued to do for her, we stopped with the WLM.

While my wife is a smart, professional woman, she is not very dominant by nature. I’ve come to believe that I can submit to her, but it will be in a softer, more vanilla way than we tried last year. My submission will need to be in a more laid back, less intense way. I think it needs to be more within the existing structure of our very healthy marriage. We are best friends, lovers, and everything in between. She doesn’t want me falling all over her. I’m not her “boy”, nor does she want me to be. I’m her husband. I’m the man that swept her off her feet years ago. Neither of us is into humiliation. If we are to enter a more WLM geared life, it needs to be much more subtle than most of what you read. This may not make for an exciting story, but I think it’s a type of WLM that suits us, and that’s what matters.

To fast forward to today, I brought the topic back up, and she seems open to trying it again. We didn’t have a long conversation, more of a pillow talk discussion. Based on what we discussed thus far, I see things going like this:

As usual, I will make my honest thoughts and opinions known. I will let her know when I disagree and why. We will still have those stimulating discussions on the big decisions in our lives.
If there is disagreement between us after discussion, she knows she has the authority to make the final decision. Call it her trump card.
I will try to keep up with as much of the household chores as possible to minimize the work she needs to do. Increasing her relaxation time is a big goal for me. I would classify myself as a service oriented submissive husband.
I will continue to pamper her and make her feel special (love doing this)
I will refrain from masturbation, with her encouragement and use of the CB-6000s
I will only orgasm with her permission (this is still more my request than hers!)

Some things I expect won’t change much. I’ve always managed the finances, and she wants that to continue. We didn’t discuss it, but I plan to clear bigger expenditures with her. We will also keep the WLM dynamic hidden from the outside world. I mentioned perhaps coming up with some sort of code so I will know when something outside the home is non-negotiable. I like the thought that she can exert her dominance over me anywhere if she desires, even in public or with family present. But being able to do so discreetly is important for both of us to maintain our privacy.

As for male chastity, we’ve already been playing with it for several months. I do hope she does become more strict with the chastity, as I have gone back to masturbating during a few of our breaks. I do think the masturbation is counter-productive and doesn’t facilitate closeness in a marriage, so I still prefer to stop that as mush as possible.

One thing I do wonder about is how things will progress. Should I expect my wife to become increasingly dominant as time goes by? It seems that is the case in some of the blogs I’ve read, but sometimes I’m uncertain where the real story ends and fantasy begins. I mean, even in the financial realm…how practical is it for the wife to have everything put into her name. Is that even smart? Probably not. Having the husband’s paycheck deposited into a bank account without his name, etc. Hmmm…not so sure that makes a lot of sense. No better than the wife not having her name on the marital property. Both ideas seem foolish.

Random Thoughts

2011-09-12T11:06:00.002-04:00

Summer is over…maybe not officially, but the kids are back in school, so that’s good enough for me! It was a very busy summer, so not much time to blog. I’m hoping to post more often as we move into fall. Been a mixed bag for me…locked some, but also hanging free quite a bit, too. I find that the busier we are, the less I’m locked. It just falls to the wayside with all the chaos of daily family life. For the record, I am now locked.

Since it’s been a while, I think I’ll just unload some random thoughts that have been running through my mind the past month.

I’ve been finding that my submissive feelings have been stronger recently. When I’ve been locked, I’ve been consumed at times with submissive desires towards my wife. I want to submit. I want to get on my knees and worship her. Lately, very few things cause me to fill my cage faster than being subservient to my wife. Even just thinking about such things has made me swoon. I think I’ve been flirting with “sub space”. I’ve been enjoying worshipping her toes. It's a very submissive thing to do, and I truly enjoy it. I do think I enjoy this more than her. She has also teased her cock with her bare feet, though not to climax recently. Giving attention to her sexy toes feeds both my desire to submit and my foot fetish. All this is fine, but it is making me again think about what it would be like to have an acknowledged FLR (female led relationship). We toyed with this about a year ago, but it didn’t really take off. My wife is quite aware of my sub tendencies, but hasn't really played to them. We do have some aspects of an FLR, but fairly slight. Something I need to think about, before talking to the wife about it again. I think I might want more, but not sure why it would work better than last time.

The longer I hang free, the more I crave being locked. The more I feel the need for my cock to be under my wife’s control. I find I miss the tension that builds up. I miss her control. It’s not easy being locked, but it does feel very right. When the cock is uncaged, it’s just too easy to masturbate. For most, that is fine. For others, like me, it just doesn’t seem right to have that unfettered access.

Once again, I am a Locked Husband

2011-08-01T12:51:00.000-04:00

As I mentioned in my last post, I knew I would be locked-up soon. The topic came back up, and I’m back in the CB-6000s. It feels good. After such a long break, I felt very ready to go back in. I’m 3 days out since my last orgasm, and have given her 2 since then, so things are really good around here! And the teasing has been wonderful. She has been consistently handling her cock when it is out (mostly at night). Even with the break, I still feel like she is making progress as my keyholder. She seems to be in control in a more natural way. As usual, without a femdom theme. In these few days, she appears to be requiring less effort to be my keyholder. That has been one of the biggest challenges from my perspective as we’ve played with male chastity. Being my keyholder is work for her, and can cause her stress. If she can manage it with less stress, that will be a huge plus.

I’m super fixated on going down on my sexy wife. She’s been enjoying some good action from my tongue, and I’m enjoying that beyond what words can express. She’s been so wet, and it’s been taking time for her to achieve orgasm. This has meant some long sessions with my face between her legs with me literally worshiping her pussy with abandon. I’ve also been allowed inside of her without being permitted to orgasm, and that has been incredibly erotic. It is such an intense feeling to make love to her while she remains in control of her cock. I slowly fuck her knowing full well that I will not be cumming. Without that piece, I find I am more sensual. My senses seem more keyed in to her than usual when I don't cum.

Summer Break

2011-07-29T12:37:00.000-04:00

Wow, it’s been well over a month since my last post. Summer time can actually be more hectic than the rest of the year when you have children and a home to maintain…summer vacations, projects around the house, etc. I wish I could tell you that I’ve been in constant lock-up along with intense daily teasing! Alas, I cannot.

We’ve been on the longest chastity break since we started playing with the cage last fall. We are not the most rigid couple you’ll ever meet. We both tend to believe in flexibility, and chastity is no exception. Having had constant access to the penis the past 5-6 weeks, I’m actually starting really crave her control again. I also think she is thinking about it again, too. We had some good old-fashioned sex yesterday, and she mentioned locking me up again. We both seemed to smile at the mention, so I suspect it’ll be happening soon. I won’t push, but I will probably take the initiative on her next mention. During our break we had some very good sex. Typically, we had sex 1-2 times a week, with a few extra sessions when we had some vacation time. She always let me cum, and I always worked hard to make sure she had the best orgasm I could give her. While I do love chastity, I still love “traditional” sex with my wife. It is still a truly intense experience for me to slowly make passionate love to her. I realize that after several years of marriage, not all men can honestly make that statement.

I hope to have reason to post again soon ;)

A Very Nice Saturday Morning

2011-06-11T16:20:00.000-04:00

I wasn't going to post today, but I came across this photo on Tumblr and it immediately reminded me of the wonderful morning I had with my wife. She wasn't feeling very well last night, and once again decided to leave me locked overnight and did not desire any attention when we went to bed. I find that I actually prefer to be locked at these times, as I feel more "accepting" of the fact that she's not in the mood when the cock is in her control. Not sure if it makes sense to anyone, but you could say I feel more relaxed or "at ease" being locked when she isn't looking to use her cock.

I was pleasantly surprised this morning when I could tell she might be up for some oral attention. She kept me locked, but allowed me to pleasure her with my tongue. It was amazing...she was so wet and very into the intimate attention that her beautiful pussy was receiving. She often caressed my balls as I worshipped between her legs. It took her quite a while before she reached an intense orgasm. Wow, it felt so good to make her cum, with the focus entirely on her. My orgasms feel good, but I get so much more mental satisfaction giving her a mind-blowing orgasm. There really is no comparsion. After I cum, I'm spent. It feels good and it's over. After my wife cums, I'm thinking about it all day, especially if I'm locked. It's a nice way to start a day. And I am still smiling.

Poll & Quick Update

2011-06-10T15:55:00.002-04:00

My last poll closed about 10 days ago. I asked visitors about their current chastity status. Not surprisingly, the majority of visitors (54%) are men currently in one form or another of male chastity. I also have a sizable percentage of men (34%) that would like their wife/significant other to lock them in chastity, or perhaps on the honor system. Let’s not forget that some couples practice male chastity using the honor system. We did before the device arrived last year, and still do so at times. It appears that a very small number of visitors to my blog are women. The poll only tallied 2% for keyholders and another 2% for those that recorded themselves as someone whose man wanted to be put in chastity. Of course, some of that total 4% may not even be women. I recognize that some gay couples may also practice male chastity. Based on my unscientific poll, it looks like very few women peruse the web in search of blogs about locking their husband in a chastity device!

Now that we have that little nugget of information, I’m going to put up a new poll. I’m still in a plastic CB-6000s device, and am curious about what other locked men are wearing. I am far from an expert on chastity devices, so I’m sure I’ll omit some of your favorite cages, so if you are a locked male, and decide to vote, just get as close as you can to what you’re wearing these days.

As a side note, I’m still locked. My wife decided to keep me locked last night, which doesn’t happen every night. It was my first locked night in a while, and I slept surprisingly well. I’ll say one thing about my device, it is comfortable. I'm only 4 days since my last orgasm, and not quite to "chastity nirvana" yet, but feel pretty good. As I like to say to my wife, "her cock is feeling obedient". While I'm not feeling that nirvana high, I'm starting to feel pretty content with her once again in full control.

Back in the Cage

2011-06-08T13:36:00.000-04:00

My last lock-up ended up lasting 9 days. That means I went 9 days without an orgasm. My beautiful wife doesn’t typically keep my locked 24/7, and that cycle was no exception. She let me out some nights, even though I was not permitted to orgasm, even if she decided to tease “her cock”. I love those teases...oh yes I do! The arousal can be beyond description after I’ve been told I will not be allowed to cum. I think that many men in chastity feel the same. We love to be told during or just prior to a lovemaking session (and yes…you can make love without penetration!) that we will not be having an orgasm. I find that when she does this, it just increases my arousal that much more, locked or unlocked. If I happen to be unlocked, those words just make it even more difficult to hold back my climax as she strokes her cock. She knows her cock well, so she seems to know when to stop. I’m usually assured of going to sleep with overwhelming desire and an incredible affection for her.

After the 9 day cycle, she decided to take a little break (hence the lack of postings here). My wife has been insanely busy with work, so I do think she needed the break. I wish I could say that I did not masturbate at all, but that is not the case. I can say that the frequency was way less than before we began playing with chastity, but I did play with her cock a few times. I told her, of course, so she knows all about it. If we’re not in a chastity cycle, we don’t worry about it too much. Heck, she knows she can lock up her cock at any time, so why would she worry? I would lock-up right that minute, so no point in getting concerned. While we go in cycles, I admit I would not fight her if she decided she wanted me locked without extended breaks.

I’m pretty excited right now, as I went back into my CB-6000s this morning. I’ve been craving it the past few days. After a couple of weeks out, I really miss having the cock fully under her control. No idea how long she’ll keep me locked this time, though I’m still eager to go beyond my 9 day record. She’s also been more restrictive on allowing me inside her. While I certainly want to be inside her, I am glad she has become more comfortable deciding when to allow it. I expect you’ll see more postings with me once again being a locked husband :)

In a Very Good Place

2011-05-18T18:17:00.001-04:00

My last couple of chastity cycles have been amazing. I’m currently on day 6 and have definitely entered “chastity nirvana” (see my earlier posts on “Acceptance”). I’ve been able to give my wife plenty of attention, and the intimacy level has been sky high. In turn, I’m feeling really, really good. I would say I entered “chastity nirvana” no later than day 5, maybe even day 4. One way I know I’ve arrived is the level of fulfillment I have after pleasuring my wife with my tongue. I am fulfilled today, so fulfilled.

We woke up this morning, and after holding her close for a while she told me I could go down on her. I asked her if she wanted me to stay locked. I was feeling very good, so was not disappointed when she said, “yes, stay locked”. Being locked during a lovemaking session allows me to completely focus on her pleasure. When I’m in “nirvana”, I find that her pleasure is my pleasure. Her every moan makes me melt. By the time she approaches orgasm, I am swimming in her ecstasy…her scent, her taste; I am in heaven. At that point my orgasm just doesn’t matter. Sure, I know it will be incredible when I am allowed to cum, but I can wait. If I can make her moan and grind into my face as she cums on my mouth I am content. If you’re a locked husband, than I suspect you know exactly what I mean.

Miscellaneous Thoughts on a Sunday

2011-05-15T16:07:00.000-04:00

A dreary Sunday and my mind is wandering here and there on the topic of male chastity.

I’ve determined that I prefer “control” over “denial”. This means that when I am locked by/for my wife, I am most excited about her being in control of “her” cock. Yes, I do love when she tells me I need to wait for my next orgasm. But, I think I enjoy her control even more. I like knowing that she decides when it will be free, when it will be stroked, and when it will be allowed to explode for her. I love that while I can view all the beautiful nude women I want on any number of websites, that I cannot stroke while I view them. I love it even more that I cannot cum for them.

I believe my wife enjoys being in control of our sexual fun more than she does denying my orgasms. If anything, I often need to remind her that “I’m fine, I don’t need to cum”. She seems so accustomed to making sure her man cums, that when we do play, it can be hard to convince her that I really am satisfied without the orgasm. This is one of the reasons why I rarely go more than a week or so between orgasms. I’ve been asking her about perhaps having me go longer, even just 11-12 days. She didn’t give me much of a reaction. She seems a bit reluctant. I guess this is fine, as long it is what she wants. I do wish she was more forceful and more definite in her control. I don’t want her to be a nasty bitch (that’s not her). But a more firm, strict keyholder would be fun. I admit, she is a great wife and keyholder, and I really don’t have anything to complain about. Based on my poll so far, there are almost 40% of you reading this blog that wish your wife/significant other would lock you up. And to those 40%? Ask her! Do your homework on the topic, but if your marriage is on a strong footing…do it. It can be so fulfilling in so many ways. I appreciate where I’m at and am grateful that my beautiful wife agreed to hold the key to my pleasure. It is an additional responsibility for a very busy professional woman and mother. It is not always easy, but it is very worth the effort.

More on Acceptance

2011-05-10T18:23:00.002-04:00

This post is somewhat related to the topic of my last post. In the 6+ months we’ve been playing with chastity, I’ve never felt more “acceptance” of her control of my cock than I do this very minute. It didn’t happen overnight. Our cycles tend to be short, usually 7-10 days. I always felt some control, heck, I had a chastity device locked onto my tool! It’s just that the last couple of cycles, it’s been a more “religious experience”. I’ve been feeling far more at peace wearing the device than when we started. Not as edgy. Even after being denied playtime, as I was this morning. Last night she hinted she might want to play this morning, not that that assured me release from the cb-6000s. As we slowly awoke, I cuddled closer, and began to softly touch her arms, shoulders, and give her some gentle kisses on her neck. She assumed I was looking for more, and told me she felt sick. I told her I was fine…and this time, I actually was fine. I was not stressed about it. Sure, I had been hoping I could pleasure her with my tongue, but I was okay.

I’ve been feeling good. Especially after 3-4 days into these last two cycles. While statements like “it’s her cock, not mine”, are exciting thoughts, I can say I feel more like it is true now, than say 3 months ago. Why? Maybe it’s taken that long for me to actually get over that loss of total control. Maybe there is more to the stages of chastity model that we haven’t quite grasped? I’m not quite sure. I’m starting to wonder how I would feel after a longer chaste period, say 3-4 weeks. I have my doubts she’ll go for that, she likes to have me cum too much, but I’m thinking about asking if she would consider it. While longer lock-ups excited me before, I always thought I’d never be able to handle one over 10 days…now, I think I could.

Acceptance

2011-05-09T10:56:00.001-04:00

Not too long ago I read a very interesting post on the "The Key is on My Nipple Ring" blog. Here is the post. Dev's blog is very well written, and quite informative. I found that particular post fascinating. When I'm in chastity, I am quite amazed at all the different feelings and emotions that I experience. I am interested in that topic to the point where I would want to study it. Dev's post analyzes the stages a locked man goes through, quite accurately, I think. What hit me like a ton of bricks was how she mentioned that a man cannot really move into what she terms as "Chastity Nirvana", until the man truly accepts that the keyholder is in control.

"Even though a man may say to his keyholder, “I have given you control,” the minute the lock is clicked and the key handed over, I don’t think that control is truly and completely given until the man moves out of the Getting to Headspace phase of the process. The hallmark of this phase is the need for the man to resolve these conflicting feelings and accept that the keyholder is in control. It is the resolution of this inner conflict that allows the man to move forward to Chastity Nirvana."

That is huge. I so understood what she meant. I seem to struggle in chastity until I resign myself to the realization that my wife/keyholder is in control. Once I truly feel that I am not in control, I'm able to settle down, relax so much more, and begin to really enjoy it. Let's be honest, it's not easy giving up that control, and my mind sometimes fights it.

First Post

2011-05-09T10:24:00.003-04:00

Well, like many locked-up husbands before me, I've decided to start a blog. I think it might be helpful to express some of the thoughts that run through my mind, especially while I'm locked and perhaps a bit frustrated. So, yes, I'm often locked in chastity. Funny thing is my wife is far from adamant about it. In fact, if I told her I didn't want to be locked, she'd probably be fine with it. Weird, huh? A husband that wants to be locked in a chastity device, have his orgasms rationed, and give up masturbation. It does sound strange.

I would classify myself as a habitual masturbator, and have been so since...I don't know, maybe age 14? I probably pulled on it almost everyday, sometimes more than once. My first marriage was pretty much sexless, so that certainly didn't help. My second wife has a much better libido, but is busy, so I was still jerking-off a fair share. Over time, I found myself getting more and more intrigued with the idea of handing over the control of my cock to my wife. There was just something incredibly exciting about giving up that control. Only cumming with her, when she wanted her cock to cum. I get worked up just typing that! We are very open, and tend to always tell each other our innermost thoughts, so I told her about it. I think she found it a bit surprising considering my overactive libido. She knew I masturbated often (like I said, we don't hide things), and it never really bothered her. So as to not ramble on about the small details forever, she agreed, and I ordered a device. That was several months ago, and we're a bit on and off as far as "her" penis being fully under her control, though it is now, and has been the past 8 days. I don't so much as stroke it without her permission. Nevermind having an orgasm without her permission. When I'm in what I've usually called a "chastity cycle", I tend to be quite rigid about it, not wanting to go against what I said I would do.

I'm not sure exactly where I'll go with this blog, and it probably won't be the best writing you'll see on the topic, and may be a bit scattered at times. When I've been locked a few days + without orgasm, I need to talk about it, and this will be the place I do that...